Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
i think im in europe. pls send help
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
tell me about the eggs
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