I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
false alarm. still invincible.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
