I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize