it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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