There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
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