Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
pray to the hookup gods
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize