Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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