I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
