pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
