I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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