Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
