so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
