Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
