My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize
