More tranny stories later!
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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