Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Apparently you make a good broom.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
