Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I wish I only lived at night.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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