Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
