i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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