You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
