ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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