his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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