it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize
