Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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