I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize