dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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