oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
