my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize