After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
