Are we in a gay sports bar?
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
