Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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