that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
You are the jesus of drinking
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Randomize
