no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Randomize