absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
