Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Randomize
