i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
