based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
