You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
