did you get engaged???
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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