Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
drinking out of a sandbucket again
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
