Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize