so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize
