I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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