At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
