Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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