we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
