You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
NoShamevember. You game?
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I touched a dick in church today
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
