If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Randomize
