That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
