my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize