I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
