I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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