that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
